


Swords

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adult Store, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-18
Updated: 2013-01-18
Packaged: 2017-11-25 23:43:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/644208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Cas go shopping.  Hilarity ensues.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Swords

It starts off innocently enough. Then again, when Castiel is involved, that’s how things usually start.

“Dean, I’m bored,” the angel says. “We should go shopping.”

Winchesters and Co. are relatively unbusy since the closing of another vampire outbreak. There haven’t been any new cases in twenty-four hours, so there’s really nothing else to do.

“Where?” Dean asks over the top of the newspaper in his hands.

Castiel shrugs. “Anywhere. It doesn’t matter.”

Dean had to admit, it was getting boring in the motel room, especially with Sam off somewhere. “Yeah, sure.” The hunter puts his newspaper down and his boots on. He leaves a note for his brother, too, just in case.

The two walk down to Main Street where the strip malls and the shopping plazas are. People give Cas weird looks as they pass but don’t say anything. Even if it is strange to wear a trench coat in the middle of the summer.

Dean goes into whatever stores Cas wants to go into. Which happens to be all of them. In order. It doesn’t even matter what they’re selling.

By the fifth store, Dean has figured out that Cas wants to go in every single store and doesn’t think much of it any more. Until the fifth.

“Welcome to House of Eden,” the greeter says. “Let me know if I can help you with anything.” She goes back to whatever she was doing before they walked in.

Dean looks around and holy shit this is not what he was expecting. They were standing in a sex shop. Worse, Cas was actually looking at the stuff. The hunter joins the angel at a display near the back.

“I don’t remember these things in Eden,” Cas mutters. He picks up one of the toys on display. “This is strange.”

Dean sees what Castiel has in his hands. Or, more accurately, what he’s playing with. “Cas, what are—put that down,” he hisses and checks to make sure nobody is watching.

“But Dean, I don’t understand. It says they’re toys.” The angel gives Dean the most confused look ever.

“That is exactly why you can’t play with it. Put it down.”

Castiel pauses like he’s contemplating putting it down, but doesn’t. “They’re probably swords. Here. Fight me,” he says and puts one in Dean’s hand. “Come on, Dean. This is fun.”

Dean does not fight the angel’s attacks. His face burns white hot with embarrassment. God, he hopes nobody is watching. “Cas, I’m telling you one last time. Put it down.” He puts his back where Cas found it.

“Can I help you boys with anything?” One of the workers came to check on them. 

“I think we’re alright, thanks,” Dean says, trying to keep his embarrassment down.

The worker looks at Cas, who is still twirling his toy like the sword he believes it is. “Uh, sir, please don’t play with any of the display toys,” she says.

“But they’re toys.” Cas looks at her with the same confused look he gave Dean. “Here, you sword fight with me.” He hands the girl the one Dean put down.  
“Castiel. Put it down. Now.”

“But Dean. Why? It says they’re toys.”

Dean sighs and takes the toys from the angel and the worker and puts them back on the display. “Sorry about him,” he says to the girl. “He’s a little confused about all this stuff. Cas, come on. We’re leaving.” He grabs the angel by the arm and marches him straight back to the motel room, embarrassed beyond any possible belief.

“Dean, why did you drag me out of that store?” Castiel demands once they’re back.

“That was a sex shop,” Dean says. “Cas, those were not swords. Those are toys for adults.” He scrubs his hand over his face. “God, I can’t believe I’m having this conversation.”

“But we’re adults. Why can’t I play with them?”

Dean sighs again, for probably the fifteenth time. “People don’t play with those. They use them for sex.”

Castiel’s face is still scrunched in confusion. Then everything becomes clear in his mind. “Do they sword fight with those things while enjoying themselves?”

The hunter tries not to laugh at the image. Then he shudders at the image and wishes he’d never seen it. “You know what, Cas? This conversation is over. We’re done talking about this.”

“But Dean, I still have questions!” the angel protests.

“We’re done, Cas.”

“Questions, Dean.” Cas tries to glare the hunter down.

“Done.”

The angel sighs, frustrated, and sits down in a chair by the window. “Fine. I’ll just ask Sam when he gets back.”

Dean rolls his eyes. “Whatever.”


End file.
